I know it has only been 10 days, but in these last 10 days I have started to learn a lot about the process of making positive changes, and these are some things that I have been doing which have made me feel better, which I thought I would write down and share with you. Over the last 10 days I have experienced a rollercoaster of emotions, and these 10 things have benefitted me.
Disclaimer: these are strategies which I have found help me, they may not help everyone but, I am just one friend passing on something I have found helps me, incase it benefits anyone else.
1. Surround yourself with people who make you want to be the best version of yourself.
One of the most important things I have been doing recently is surrounding myself with people who make me want to be the best possible of myself. This has included reconnecting with people who I have not seen in two years. Being around these people who you know care about you, and you care equally about them, has meant I have not constantly questioned my relationship with them, and I had honestly forgotten what that was like. Because of this mutual respect and trust for each other , it has meant that this journey I am has became easier.
2. Plan things which make you want to improve.
I have found that planning events which make me want to improve, has helped me stay positive and improve my state of mind. For example events like meeting friends, or planning trips away (Im going to Paris to meet a friend 🙂 ). Personally I also like to use a count down app to remind me, that even when it feels like things I am looking forward to are far away, they are not to long.
3. Creating a music playlist of songs which hold meaning to you, make you smile, or remind you of good times, and listening to it.
4. Everyone will react differently to you, some positive, some negative, and that’s ok!
When I first began to tell people that I was doing this whole 100 days of self improvement thing, their reactions varied. Some were positive, and some were negative, and you know what’s that’s ok. Learning and realising that everyone is going to react differently to you and your actions is something which has really helped me, as I have began to see that I not everyone will react the way you want them to and that ok.
5. Always do what makes you happy.
6. Hold onto the good times don’t focus on the bad.
One of the reasons I started to blog was because I couldn’t see the positive sides of a recent situation I found myself in, which had once been positive and has ended badly. Every time I looked back I could only see the negative things, and had started to forget the good times we had together, which was having a negative impact on my emotional wellness. However recently someone said to me:
“its not the destination that matters, it is the journey”.
Putting this quote into sight of this recent situation has helped me let go of some anger I have felt, as I have began to look back and remember the good times, as well as the. bad, and hold onto them, which has helped me start to move on, and begin to feel better
7. Being as open and honest with those around you, makes most situations 100 times easier to deal with, than dealing with it yourself.
There is a saying “a problem shared is a problem halved” well I can well and truly say this is true! 10 days ago, I was holding all of my problems in, not letting anyone in. I was heart broken, and had been for a while, and did not let anyone know how I was feeling, and one day it all became to much, and I ended up telling someone very close to me everything. At first I was worried about their reaction, however I quickly realised it was what I should of done a long time ago, and I have now started letting more people in, which is definitely helping.
8. Do things which challenge you.
Challenging yourself to trying new things, never fails to keep your mind occupied. I have found that keeping myself busy is keeping my mind from wondering back, into places which I don’t want to be. I have recently became so engrossed in a new challenge, that I completely forget everything which has been happening. Whether this is, starting a blog, learning to play a new song, reading a play, building a cabinet (yep that actually happened hah)
9. Admit to yourself that you have made mistakes.
In every situation there is always two sides. When something ends particularly a relationship of any form friendship or anything, there is always more than one point of view. At first you spend most of the time time blaming the other person, holding a lot of anger towards them, however I have realised that the quicker you begin to accept that you were in the wrong and acknowledge the mistakes you made the easier it is to begin to move forward rather than constantly moving backwards.
10. Accept that it’s time to move on, and that you can’t punish yourself for ever.
When my friendship first ended I started punishing myself, over analysing everything I had said and done, Constantly trying to come up with ways to fix everything. However I have now realised that sometimes (even when it is hard), that often the best thing to do is move on, and you can’t keep punishing yourself forever because it will stop you from forming meaningful relationships with other.
E's Journey 